DawgTalkers.net Forums DawgTalk Tailgate Forum Interview with Moondog

Some fun on a Friday.

GO CAVS!!

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Mascot's job is ruff, but Moondog's ready to rock
Friday, April 20, 2007
John Campanelli
Plain Dealer reporter

To find out how the Cavaliers are going to do this postseason, you don't ask the fans, the reporters or even the coaches. You ask a guy who sweats on the court each night.

You ask Moondog.

The Cavaliers' mascot answered a few questions this week via e-mail (interviewing him face-to-face is impossible because the high frequencies he uses when discussing Carlos Boozer are not audible to the human ear).

- John Campanelli, Plain Dealer reporter

Q: Where's your favorite fire hydrant?

A: They all look the same to me.

Q: Lassie walks into Quicken Loans Arena during the fourth quarter of a close game, wags her tail at you and asks you to go back to her pad right away; what do you do?

A: First of all, Lassie is like 300 years old. I like ladies a little younger than her. And nothing is going to come between me and my Cavs. Lassie can bark out her number and perhaps I will meet her up at the old mill after the Cavs get the victory.

Q: Are you paper-trained? If so, which newspaper and section do you prefer?

A: I am, and I have Branson Wright to thank.

Q: What are you doing to avoid any illnesses with this horrible pet-food contamination?

A: I prefer people food anyway, so this pet-food scare has just been a good excuse for me to get takeout.

First thing that comes into your mind when I say:

Q: Pavlov?

A: Stop ringing that bell. I'm coming already.

Q: Invisible fence?

A: Cruel and unusual punishment.

Q: Marmaduke?

A; Unfunny.

Q: Add-water-to-make-gravy dog food.

A: Gruel, and unusual punishment.

Q: Do you bring the paper and slippers to players in the morning?

A: No, but Dan Gilbert likes the paper on the right side of the slippers.

Q: Where are you going to hang out in LeBron's new house?

A: Probably the Ferris Wheel Room, but if the lines are long there I might slip out to watch airplanes land on the tarmac.

Q: What is your surefire victory shot in a game of H-O-R-S-E?

A: Depends who I am playing, but usually the backwards halfcourt shot is my go-to.

Q: You thoughts on "American Idol" this season?

A: I don't watch. That's more painful than a Direct TV Season Pass of the Memphis Grizzlies.

Q; What do you do when you get an uncontrollable urge to scratch something that shouldn't be scratched in public?

A: Scratch it.

Q: What do you do in the off-season?

A: Plan for next season. This year I hope to be cutting up paper for a ticker-tape parade and touring with a large trophy.

Q: How do you stay in such great shape?

A: First of all, thanks for noticing. I really focus on the first five minutes of "Eight-Minute Abs" and try to watch what I eat. It's actually easy to stay fit when you are running laps around the Q and up and down all the stairs whooping it up with all the fans.

Q: How often do you chase cars?

A: More in the off-season than I care to admit. Chasing them is fun, but there is no reward. Catching them is painful and fruitless.

Q: What can you do, as a dog and top mascot, to make sure refs don't make bad calls?

A: There are a couple of approaches. Yell and let them know how horrible they are and hope they are afraid to make calls against you or coddle them and hope they like you so much they can't make calls against you. I can't reveal my method, but I will say they are an amazingly talented group of well-trained professionals. Handsome, too. Probably totally underpaid, now that I think about it.

Q: What basketball rule needs to be changed?

A: I don't know all the rules. I tend to make my own up as I go. I am bothered that I can't stand on the scorers table (I get fined $5,000, no kidding). That seems to me to be one of the best views. That's a rule I would seriously look at changing.

Q: How important is home-court advantage?

A: For most teams, it helps. With our fans it's huge. Nobody wants to play us here.

Q: Have you been able to mark the Cavs' territory at any away arenas?

A: No comment, but the Palace at Auburn Hills sure doesn't smell like a palace on the west side.

Q: Why do kids love you so much?

A: I never ask them to clean their room, I encourage them to scream and make noise, and I am pretty adorable ("applies to kids and the ladies).

Q: If you weren't the Cavs mascot what would you be?

A: Stray.

Q: Have you ever helped a guy propose to a girl at the Q?

A: Yes. A few times. I always think it's bizarre, but I play along. So far they all have said yes, so that's good.

Q: What do you dream about at night?

A: The Miami Heat dance team all fighting over which one gets to rub my belly and hand the championship trophy over to me.

Q: What's the best item at the Quicken Loans Arena concession stands?

A: I rarely have time to eat at games, but I do a bit of "sampling" of fans food. The popcorn is always nice, and easy for me to eat. They really should consider serving the soda in bowls.

Q: Rumor has it that you have a Carlos Boozer bobblehead as a chew toy; is that true?

A: Bobbleheads make poor chew toys. But I do have a Boozer hydrant in my yard.

Q: How do you psyche out opponents?

A: Point to our fans.

Q: What's Whammer, the old Cavaliers polar-bear mascot, doing these days?

A: He e-mails the braintrust of the Cavs about twice a week trying to get his old job back. I throw him a bone occasionally and invite him back, mostly to mock him. Finally he's good for a laugh.

Q: It's been said that dogs have the ability to sense the future. What's going to happen in the postseason?

A: One team is going to beat the odds and win the whole thing. I sense a ticker-tape parade.

LOL Cute, I liked it!