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Got this in an e-mail. Had to chuckle because each and everyone of these warnings are really out there. Pick up any package or user manual and you will see great warnings like these.



In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap,"
(and that would be how???....)

On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)

On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time)?

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what)?

On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious)

On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, ooh...fly Delta?)

On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my ..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity.



If anyone has one they want to share please feel free to add that warning to the list.

Did you know there's a sign on the bottom of a dumpster, saying something like, "Don't Stand Under." ???

That does not surprise me. I've seen some that had me doing <<this after reading it.

I know, but it still amazes me that someone is that dang stupid to do that in the first place. Let's be real, think about some of the things that are said in the warnings. Makes you wonder who the dumbarse was that did something that stupid.

Ive ironed clothes while I was wearing them

ive read on Blistex...not to have it come in contact with your eyes...

cuz i cant remember the last time i HAVENT had chapped eyes...i guess if youve no visine...why not blistex?

Ex-Lax says it works while you sleep.

I can't speak for anyone else, but I don't want that. I want to be awake when it works.

I've always thought it was totally unecessary to give instructions on a shampoo bottle.

You know how the shampoo industry acheived their greatest sales increase ever?

They did so with 1 word.

Their instructions said " Wash and Rinse" ......

They added the word "Repeat" and (From what I read a long time ago in a history of advertising) saw their sales increase by something like 30%.

"On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.' "

Oh wow...haha. Yknow...if i were to stop anything...I don't think I would use my genitals. Especially not a chainsaw .

Billy Joe, how are we going to stop that chainsaw, now that we're done cutting your grass?

Well, Bubba Dean, I got an idea, watch this.......

Was the before or after the case of PBR?

Preparation H warns you.... "do not take orally"

You know some dumb slob had to do it for them to put that warning up.